|Advice, help, encouragement... anything?
||[Mar. 28th, 2007|03:00 pm]
I have two daughters, a 19-mo-old and a 1-mo-old. The little one seems to be a real high needs baby... crying a lot, often difficult to soothe and sometimes impossible to soothe. It's creating a lot of stress in our household... the older one is reacting well to the newcomer, and it wouldn't be such a big problem if the little one were an easier baby... but she seems to spend most of her waking time crying, and sometimes nothing we (her mom or dad) do can calm her down. She nurses on demand but doesn't seem to comfort nurse and spits out pacifiers. (The lack of comfort nursing may have to do with the fact that I have an oversupply since I pump for the older one who's allergic to cow's milk. How do mothers of twins deal with comfort nursing???) She hasn't immediately taken to slings or the Snugli (though we keep trying to put her in them and sometimes she likes being there), swaddling is also hit-and-miss. The only thing that seems to ALMOST always work is bouncing with her on a fitness ball, she seems to like that motion. She also usually sleeps through car and stroller rides. But on occasion even that doesn't calm her down and she screams her little head off. We thought maybe her belly hurt, so I tried giving her some anti-gas drops, it didn't make much difference. Nothing we tried seems to work consistently, and we're getting discouraged. My older daughter wasn't this difficult to soothe, but maybe I've just blocked the memories. :P Or maybe I didn't concurrently have a toddler who made it difficult to impossible to respond to the baby on demand...|
In the meanwhile, I feel incredibly sorry for my older daughter, because either I'm trying to soothe her fussy sister or if I give up, she gets to listen to the baby crying. :( What must she think of all this? She's pretty tolerant of the new baby, and seems interested in her. I try to go out of my way to respond to my older daughter's requests and give her priority, but now I wonder whether that's making the situation worse with her sister... on the other hand, there are times I have to tell my daughter that she has to wait, and she generally doesn't handle that too well.
How do others with two (or more, ye gads!) kids do it where the age difference is so small? How the heck can you juggle a high-needs baby and year-and-a-half old toddler?
Any words of encouragement would be greatly appreciated... :P